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Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Outer vs Inner Beauty

We are often told that physical appearance and beauty are only skin deep and we should not judge a person by their physical appearance, but are we truly doing that?

Is beauty only skin deep to us or are we truly judging a person based on how he/she looks?
Do we pay attention to handsome hunks and beautiful babes more than we do to those plain-looking guys or plain janes?

Realitiscally, we are all just ordinary human beings; and we cannot blame others for judging us as superficial beings as we tend to do the same unto others.
I have recently watched the TVB drama, 'The Ultimate Crime Fighter' and I am into the pairing of Gigi and Moses since I saw them in the trailer of Gem of Life.
IMHO, they really look good together and the chemistry is just perfect.

In the former, Gigi played a rather plain-jane looking character and was often teased for her looks. She somehow had this portruding teeth which caused her to speak in a rather huffy manner. Her glasses also tend to make her look rather gawky and she has never had any admirer in her life except for an innocent and geeky looking guy who patronizes her father's restaurant daily to steal a look at her.
Despite her looks, she has fallen head over heels in love with Moses who played a really hunky and suave police inspector.
Initially, he was rather resistant towards her affection as he was pursuing his hot long lost classmate who eventually got married to her boyfriend.
Touched by all the things done by Gigi, he eventually accepted her.
However, the lady seems to be more concerned about his welfare while he is playing hot and cold most of the time; or displaying his rather macho manner.
In fact, he was even oblivious to when she was offended or miserable. Things were bad when he does not even have the initiative to introduce her to his friends.
His sister made a comment that he was just being superficial and she believed that he will not react this way if his girlfriend was a hot and gorgeous babe.

It made me think, are we all just superficial beings?
Are looks really above all?
Do we tend to be more concerned by how we can present our beaus to the public by their physical appearances?
Perhaps, perhaps not.

Sometimes, inner beauty is more important to some of us; although we also cannot run away from the fact that we still do perceive beauty as a criterion.
Admit it, we are all superficial beings.
Will you look at the girl if she's not pretty?
Or will you even blush when a hot looking guy winks/smiles at you?

Reverse the picture, will you still have the same reaction if the girl wears specs and has really old-fashioned clothes on?
Or if the guy is wearing the large specs and smiles at you, displaying his teeth full of braces?

However, most of us have also passed this stage of accepting that outer beauty is most important and we have also been more receptive towards the importance of inner beauty and the heart of the person we are attracted to.
It is true that beauty is only skin deep and we tend to be more attracted to the lovely person inside who is always thoughtful and kind towards others.
Being able to be with the person you love and is a great person with a big heart is the key.

Does the looks still matter in this context?
Will you be proud to bring that wonderful person with a big heart to showcase to all your good looking friends who are still that superficial towards looks?
Are you mentally prepared to endure the laughs and teasing from your buddies?

It is a decision you have to make, as at the end of the day, we are still humans and humiliation remains one of our weakest point.
But if you truly cherish the person and nothing is more important than your own happiness, then you should truly be able to brave it all.
UNLESS, you are not really that INTO him/her.....and again, that is a question you have to answer yourself.

I always think that love can conquer all, and if you are really that into the person, what is a few laughs or giggles or stares from your friends?
Then again, it is solely a self-decision....and it is always easier said than done.

Sometimes, the simplest answer lies in those innocent questions asked by our friends - why do some people hide their relationship from others?
Yeah, why?
Something we need to ask ourselves, it's not easy....and there's always a reason.
Let's not judge others, I've always believed that people will share when they're ready or if they don't, what's that any of our business?

Anyway, I am happy that media has also started to center on this fact about outer vs inner beauty. I was even fast to conclude that they will probably beautify Gigi in the later part of the show and Moses will fall head over heels in love with her in return, but no, too old-school.
The show sustained her looks but emphasized on her kind character and her innocence which gained her affection and sympathy from most of us viewers.

It is cruel to judge people by their looks and with all that matters, just put yourself in another's shoes before you jump on their looks and display your disgusted look.
Imagine when you were really sick or were covered with spots, what was the treatment you received from others?
How did you feel when people shy away from you or will not look at you at all?

Something to ponder upon...

Sunday, February 15, 2009

Love is in the air....with V-DAY

Love WAS in the air; as we have just seen the passing of the lovely and romantic Valentine's Day where everywhere you go, you see lovebirds hanging on to each other's arms and the lady is probably holding a decently sized bouquet of flowers (usually red roses) and the duo is staring lovingly and all lovey dovey into each other's eyes, oblivious to whatever that is going on around them.

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What a sweet and perfect picture to paint of this much-celebrated and doted occasion around the world, right?

But in reality, do we really know what is the purpose of V-DAY and how it came all about?

I think I have shared a story on the origin of this occasion before; sometime last year, you can check my previous posts.
The whole idea is about celebrating love, spending time (AND Money) with your loved ones (usually only refer to your beau, and take note, mainly during the courting stage) and thinking of only him or her during the entire day - in short, your whole attention is focused on only your loved one.

A simple question, if Valentine's Day is a day to celebrate love, and this is only a one day with 24 hours out of 365 days, what do you do with your loved one on the remaining 364 days when it's not V-DAY?

I am not a party pooper nor am I against the romantic celebration, as Valentine's Day is indeed a sweet and lovely occasion but I would like to merely state a fact that the whole idea is about LOVE.

LOVE is a vague subject, nobody could ever give a precise definition on what is love or how do we define love as there is no one single statement that can describe love alone.
It differs in different light, and it viewed with different perspectives and it is YOU who will know when you have experienced it.
Being in love with the person does not necessarily mean that you need to buy her an entire rose plantation or surprising her with a truckload of flowers.
Nor does it mean that you are willing to switch off your phone for that 24 hours to be with her and listen to her, staring lovingly into her eyes.
Neither does it mean that you are willing to spare an exorbitant amount to bring her to a highly exclusive restaurant and pay for a meal which costs 3-4 times more than the usual price and still find that you are not full, and may need to cook your own Maggi mee after sending her home at midnight and crying over the amount you just spent for that one day and cursing the person who invented this whole occasion.

It is nothing material, love is just a simple feeling and a wonderful act.
It is unconditional and it cannot be measured or compared to.
It is pure, and never jealous, and it does not expect anything in return.

A stalk of rose cannot be compared to your friend's rich boyfriend's 999 stalks of roses given to her, to measure the depth of his love for her and yours for you.

Love has no value nor a price tag
Love recognises no one; anyone can be infected with love
Love has no boundaries, no limits, and is not confined by age.

Love is not questionable, nor debatable
There is no right or wrong in love; neither is it fair nor dark

It is a GIFT in itself and count yourself lucky to be blessed with the ability to love and be loved by people around you.

Valentine's Day is not just a commercialized version manipulated by the intelligent business folks out there to centralize on dating couples, it is a whole celebration of LOVE and the existence of love.

The next time when you think of V-Day, don't just think of your gf or bf and how you want to surprise him/her.
Think of your loved ones too; who in this context are the people who loved you as much; in a different kind of way - your parents (MUmmy and Daddy), siblings, relatives, grandparents, best friends, etc
Give them a hug or a simple call to tell them, I love you and you will be surprised at how warm it felt when they respond with I Love you too.

It is not a day to nag at the exorbitant prices, and cracking your head over what to buy....
A simple I LOVE YOU may probably be the perfect solution....

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I wish you and your loved ones a HAPPY Valentine's DAY on the 14th of Feb and eternal LOVE and happiness for the remaining 364 days of your year and for as long as you live:)

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Please bear with me...

I know that I have been lagging in my blog posts; and updates on the stories, life, food, etc...but I am experiencing difficulty to access the Internet due to my residence location lately.

Hopefully, I can be up and running again soon.
In the meantime, with my workload and everything, things will have to move a little bit slower as I will not have time to update during the day, and at night, back at my place, I do not have the luxury to access to the Internet at the moment.
Am working on it, sorry for the lack of updates when you hop over to my blogs....please bear with me at the moment, I will definitely be up again very soon; as soon as I settle with the Internet.

I will be back very soon....I will still be updating but on a more seasonal or whenever I have something that is bursting within me...hahahaha:)

Have a great working day!~

Wednesday, February 04, 2009

These Hazy Sleazy Days...

And I was wondering what was the cause of my nose irritations, my dry throat and taut red skin recently.....it was none other than the old 'friend' (or foe) himself; Mr HAZE.

It seems that the Penang island has been shrouded by the hot weather during the CNY period; albeit the weather forecasts that the northern region can expect a cooler weather for the Lunar New Year this year.
When can we ever rely on weather forecasts?
Gosh, it must have been Sahara desert in disguise visiting the northern region as it was enveloped with a sickeningly hot and humid weather which just caused major discomfort among all the residents up here.

A sensitive person like me has way beforehand experienced the warning signs and the hints of the old enemy.
It's a dreadful phenomenon and it's causing so much discomfort and inconvenience to everyone around.
I totally hate the smell of smoke everywhere whenever I breathe!

To top it off, I am still angered by the number of inconsiderate and guiltless people who are still causing more harm by burning their garbage in the open!
What age are we living in today; why do they still need to burn their garbage?
Have they no sense that the environment is as bad as it is now?

I bet the Chinese New Year is also another contributing factor; the fireworks display and the firecrackers emit a hazardous and toxic smoke into the air; causing the smoky effects in the sky.

The environment has been abused over and over again by the people who lived without their inner conscience and the social awareness for the well-being of everyone around them.

Nobody seems to stop and think about the environment around us today; although the awareness has increased a little compared to the olden days.
There are more campaigns carried out with the notion of recycling and reducing the level of pollution; although there are also an equal population who still continues to throw plastic bags into the river and their cans along the grass in the park they stroll or the hills they hike.

*Lets out a BIG SIGH*

If only we can all learn to be civic and environment conscious, then the world would be a better place to live in, right?

For now, I'd better start looking for those masks to cover my mouths and nose; I wonder whether they have anything for my face....it's also irritated by the dirty and polluted air!:(

***And to give the weather forecast a little credit, their prediction was sort of accurate as the southern region (KL) was definitely welcoming a wet new year with the showers they are getting!***

Tuesday, February 03, 2009

Can you trust your beau's BFF?

An interesting topic caught my attention this morning; something that I was discussing with a friend recently too (funny how there is always this deja vu or interesting coincidence I have with all the discussion topics huh? I must be psychic or something:p )

Would you trust your girlfriend/boyfriend with their best friend if their BFF happens to be of the opposite sex?
What would be your say on this?

There was a lady who started the interesting melodrama about how she will definitely not trust her beau with his lady best friend.
Her argument?
Why would the boyfriend needs a lady best friend when he has a girlfriend?
She can be his best friend; in fact she will be all there fo him when he needs her; she's all that he needs.

Interesting argument and a rather sticky situation, this one is.
Controversial as usual as it always depends on individual perception and also the understanding among the couple involved.

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Your boyfriend or girlfriend's best friend is of the opposite sex; something unique but not unusual.
I think most of us have grown up hanging out with friends of different backgrounds, age and definitely gender.
It is so common that we tend to overlook the sensitivity of these issues until we are involved in it.

My opinion of this?
I would say, why not?
I would definitely trust my boyfriend with his female best friend for one simple reason: I trust him.

Why would I trust him?
Well, why would I be with someone I do not trust, in the very first place?
If I do not trust that person, how could I possibly be in a relationship with him and spending our time together?
The limit is there; but the liberty of human rights is also there.
A relationship is not a golden cage; whereby once you are involved with that special someone, you are off limits to everyone around you - especially those of the opposite sex.
I apologize if you do not think the same way; but this is my opinion which I believe in.

Furthermore, the fundamental of a relationship is built on trust; besides the love element.
Being with someone is being able to trust him/her and enjoying your time with them.

If you have doubts, it doesn't matter whether the issue of his best friend is involved.
Even if his BFF is of the same gender, you will still feel insecure and jealous due to the amount of time they spend with each other or the unknown secrets to you which he shares with his BFF.

It is undeniable that it will be a little awkward that your boyfriend /girlfriend is spending lots of time with their BFF too; but if you are having that minor jealousy, you can bring it up to your beau and perhaps you can get him/her to introduce their BFF to you so that you can get to know them better and see for yourself how they are valued in your beau's eyes.
At the same time, you will also know the similarity and the joy they share being each other's best friends.
On a side note, you may be able to tell whether there is anything else above that platonic friendship (though I must warn that this can be dangerous to your relationship as well as he/she may just think you are being jealous)

Mutual understanding and trust is important to you and your beau in situations like these.
If you absolutely have no room to tolerate their friendship and you're extremely uncomfortable with how close they are, you might want to consider taking a step out of the relationship.
You can talk to your beau, but bear in mind that he/she may not oblige especially when they have been best friends for a long time.
It is always unfair and cruel to make them choose between their best friends and you; just like how unfair it is when you are made to choose.

Put yourself in their shoes; do you really want to be constantly hearing unhappy thoughts from your beau whenever you are with your best friend or just hanging out for a simple chat?
Do not always assume that things can be controlled by you; it is more of a give and take.

You may be able to tell him not to meet his female best friend anymore, but what is stopping him from doing so?
You will probably only ignite that sneaking around attitude in him and when there are more secrets among the two of you, that's when the relationship spells trouble.

Besides, if he really wants to cheat on you, is there a way you can stop him?
Can you really monitor his every move?
Not unless you put a chain onto him...

And if you really suspect he's cheating on you, is there a point being in the relationship anymore?
You can't trust him anymore, and frankly, if a guy wants to cheat, he will do it no matter how; provided he is never caught.
There is no way of stopping him; the willpower is in him.
Anyhow, he will cheat whenever he wants to and this is totally out of your control.

So, the root of this whole situation is not that tricky anyway; from how I look at it.
It is just a simple question which roots back to you; the affected player in the situation itself.
Stop blaming your beau for having a BFF who is of an opposite gender; it is not really the point of the question.

The key is in yourself; are you able to accept their opposite-gender-friendship which could have started way before you?
Are you able to tolerate them sharing secrets and problems with each other; or things that he could not confide in you?

It is wholly up to you; the world is round, we can never be seeing the same things again and again.
Cross gender friendships are definitely not unusual nor out of space, it is just like everyday things we see in life like you and me.
That is why people are involved in relationships anyway; the attraction to the opposite gender and also friendships.
Of course, a little dangerous to use the attraction element in friendships though...although I believe there must be certain things they are attracted to each other in the first place anyway;) to be best friends :D
That's why they say 'Opposites Attract'

I guess I am not truly in this situation; although I do have lots of close and really good friends whom I can confide in and mind you, a few of them are guys as well.
However, ultimately my bestest bestest friend is still a girl; who is totally an opposite of me in her character. I still have close guy friends and thankfully, it is not an issue for anyone:)

Your say?
Are you in the same situation with a BFF of the opposite gender or you are safe with a same gender bFF?

Monday, February 02, 2009

The holiday mood is in the air...

Coming back from a long break (well, one week++ is a great length of break possible after we started working anyway), it is a fresh new start and a positive outlook for the year ahead.

Typically after a long break, most of us will feel refreshed and looking forward to get back to work.
Well, not all the time, coz some of us will also feel the transitional drag and will kinda zoom out a little, filling our thoughts with things we could do when we were enjoying our holiday;)

Ahhhhh......holiday is such a blissful word....not that work sounds so terrifying...but it's really nice to enjoy and sit back to relax.

Though, I must say too....too much of free time on hand is not good as we will probably be idle and erm, useless?

I think I must be crappin my blog again....time to get back to work .....thoughts of holiday is only realistic on Fridays now:p